My Dream Man

So, I tend to complain a lot on Facebook and Twitter about being "forever alone". I think it's about time to describe what I'm looking for in a guy so that you'll know why it's impossible and why I feel this way. I know this is a long-ass note and you don't have to read through it all (I actually advise you not to because it's stupid) but I thought I might as well post what I wrote last night, because why not.

My dream boyfriend (eventually husband) would be someone I can trust with everything. From simple things like a password to my Facebook to huge things like trusting that he won’t go out and cheat on me etc. And vice versa; he needs to trust me as well. Trust is a key essential in any relationship and it’s obviously something I need in my future relationship with him.

I need a man. I don’t want a boy. I define a man as being mature with some childlike qualities (such as playing video games and goofing around). I define a boy as being a child who hasn’t matured completely and will make huge deals out of absolutely nothing. It’s very important that my man will be mature and that he won’t be a baby about everything. That leads into his age. Age is important to me. I’m not looking for someone who’s younger than me or about the same age because I find that to be weird. I want a guy who’s anywhere between 2 to 8 years older. A key reason being that I want a family in the next 3-4 years and so that means I need him to be ready for it. Usually guys want a family when they’re older anyway, so that would be perfect for both of us.

I want him to have a good sense of humor. For him to be someone who makes me laugh just to hear my laugh. We can joke around and be silly together without feeling embarrassed or stupid. It’s not a good relationship if you don’t have fun xD However, when it comes to certain topics, I need him to be serious and talk about things. It’s important that he listens to me, because I have things in my life that are very serious and concerning to my love life that he needs to understand and be okay with. If he’s not okay with it, I’m not okay with him.

Of course he needs to be attracted to me! I don’t want a man who just dates me because I have a good personality. I want him to stare at me because he thinks I’m the most beautiful girl in the world. I want him to tell me I’m beautiful and not hot. There’s a huge difference between being beautiful and being hot. Hot is a term for men when they find a woman to be attractive and want to bang them. Beautiful is a term for men when they find a woman to be attractive and want to marry them. I want a man that loves me both inside and out. And same with me. I want the guy to be really pleasing to the eye. If there’s no physical attraction, there can’t be a healthy relationship. I want to enjoy kissing him and whatnot, not trying to avoid it at all costs because he’s not attractive to me. (A man with sexy abs and muscles wouldn’t hurt either, but it’s okay if he’s not super muscular ;)

Some specific features I would love for him to have would be dimples, a bunny trail, and something unique that only he does. That may be a special type of laugh, or a gesture when he’s nervous (such as a scratch (back of the neck or head is ADORABLE) or a half smile). Just something that he does without knowing that he’s doing it, I find it to be incredibly attractive and I would love to have that type of special feature about him. Also, a guy who has tattoos and/or piercings wouldn’t be too bad. (Not like the guys in the tattoo shop who have them EVERY-FREAKING-WHERE but a couple here and there is very hot).

So anyway, that leads to the physical aspects of the relationship. I want a man that likes to snuggle and show some PDA. Cute kisses and holding hands in public is perfect to me. I want others to be jealous of what he and I share. I want him to enjoy kissing me and cuddling me and I want him to show me that he loves me in those ways. It makes me feel special.

Quite honestly, I don’t want the guy to be shy. I know what it’s like to date a shy person and for me being shy, it leads to no talking and awkward conversations if we ever do talk. I need him to be outgoing but not popular. Popular guys who know everyone is kinda dangerous to me. Depending on what background he has, since I tend to be very jealous I wouldn’t want him going out all the time with different people. I want him to be the right kind of outgoing person. Someone who’s not afraid to talk to people so he can make the first move ;)

That’s also very important in finding the right guy. I am old fashioned in the way that I do not feel like I have the obligation to go up and talk to the dude. (That means I want to meet him in person, not online) It is not my job, it is his. I feel that if the guy sees me and knows that he wants to get to know me, then he should do his part and talk to me. Since I’m the shyest person ever, I never make the first move. I guess what I’m really saying is that I want us to share love at first sight; which is the first impossibility of my perfect man.

My perfect man has to be a video game nerd, with a more specific love for Nintendo (even morespecifically Zelda). That is absolutely ESSENTIAL to me for a couple of reasons. One, I want us to have a love for Nintendo so that we can have conversations about it. I want us to play video games when we’re bored because it’s fun as hell and I love it! The second reason is more important. When I have children, they’re going to be my little Nintendo nerds. They’re going to play the SNES and Nintendo 64 and Gamecube and if my future husband doesn’t like Nintendo then it won’t work out. I grew up with parents who loved Nintendo and that’s what got me into the whole thing. I want my children to have the same experience because it’s the best ever!

I want him to have a love for the paranormal. I LOVE being scared, and I don’t want a man who’s a scaredy cat. I would love to go on walks through the cemetery at night and go to abandoned houses in the middle of the night and get creeped out. To me, it’s romantic and being scared means that he’ll be there for me. It’s kinda cute in a way ;)

That leads into my love for zombies. I want my guy to be fascinated with zombies and go to zombie crawl with me every October. I want him to play zombie video games and watch zombie movies and The Walking Dead and read my zombie stories. Zombies are strangely important to me and I don’t want my man to be weirded out by my love of them. Even though it really is weird xD

My perfect man HAS to be some kind of artist. I definitely do not want an athlete in my family (Working out does not count, stating back to the fact that I wouldn’t mind a man with awesome muscles). I doNOT want my children to go into sports or anything of the sort. I want them to have pure creativity blood. That means my man has to have a love of something creative such as an artist, a photographer, a writer (most preferred since I’m a writer myself), a graphic designer, a cook/baker, a musician, or anything of the sort. What I’m saying is that I don’t want a man with a career like a doctor, lawyer, athlete, business man, military/police/fire fighter (too dangerous), or anything that’s super boring.

OF COURSE the number one most important quality I want in a man is that he HAS to be great with children. I want four kids someday (soonish!) so that means those children need a GREAT daddy. I want him to love them unconditionally no matter what. Those children (and me!) have to be the most important things in his life. The most attractive thing in a man is one who is good with kids. It shows great husband material.

My religion is very important so he’d have to be Christian. However, I don’t want him to be crazy religious. Going to church with me (and eventually with the kids) is something I want, and because I want my kids to be Christian, it would not help if the man I end up with was atheist or freakin Jewish or something. It just wouldn’t work out.

Location is key. I love Colorado and I do not want to move anywhere out of Fort Collins. I would like to travel with him though, but never live anywhere except my home. He has to have the same type of love for Colorado as I do or it also just wouldn’t work out.

Family is also key. If he doesn’t love my family then he does not truly love me. How I was shaped and molded to become the person I am today was because of my family; my mother, my father and my brother. If my man can’t get along with them, then it’s over no matter how much I love him. I love my family more and I hope that goes for his family with me as well.As for the future, with the marriage proposal, I do not want a public one. Something stupid like in a restaurant or whatever is not okay with me. Either somewhere creative or someplace special like where we first met or had our first date or our first kiss or where we first said we loved each other; now THAT’S a perfect proposal.

Something really picky would be the name. I know I can’t control that so it’d just have to be luck, but I would like him to have a J name (because that seems to be good luck for me) but NO Chris’. I’ve had bad experiences with Chris’ and I find that name to be bad luck. To be honest, I will not even consider dating the guy if his name is Chris. Also last name is pretty important to me. When we get married, I want a last name that fits my first name. If that doesn’t really work, it’s okay, I’ll just keep my maiden name along with his name. Like I said, I’m not too worried about what his name will be since I can’t control it (cept Chris) but it’d just be a plus if it was something I liked!

And of course, I want him to be a romantic. I want him to do special things for me. I want him to take me out to dinner for special occasions, or really no occasion at all. I want him to surprise me with presents (creative ones though, not stupid jewelry or crap like that. Flowers are okay ;) but not all the time. He has to be creative about it.) I want lots of hugs and kisses, lots of attention, and especially protection. I want him to know that he’s lucky to have me and that I’m worth it, and I want him to love me no matter how many fights we go through or any troubles we encounter; at the end of the day we love each other unconditionally and will until the day we die.

Unfortunately I do not have any hope that I will find this man. This was just a fun thing I wrote to make myself feel better.

THE END.